June 12 -- "Prayers For Bobby" -- Wow -- one of my Joyful Healer friends gave me this DVD. She said I ought to watch it and keep it to share with others who may be struggling. I did not know what it was about -- my goodness what an emotional ride it was.

This movie is based on a true story about a conservative Christian family in the late 70's and early 80's from Walnut Creek, CA. This is the same area I grew up in a few years earlier. One of the boys in the family, Bobby, reveals to his parents that he is gay. They freak out -- especially mom. He is taken to a Christian support group, a psychiatrist who tries to "heal" him, and his mom tapes intimidating scripture verses all over his bedroom. They even arrange dates for him with the opposite sex.

Bobby is looking for support, love, and acceptance -- but he gets fear and pressure and condemnation. He gets more and more deeply depressed by the prejudice and bigotry of his own family. He violently ends his life and the rest of the movie is about the family's struggle (particularly the mother) to understand homosexuality and the intolerance that led Bobby to such despair.

This is a powerful movie that shows how scripture can be used destructively to reinforce bigotry and prejudice. But it is also about the power to change through experience and forgiveness. You will need lots of tissues to get through it.

We have come a long way toward understanding and acceptance since the late 70's but we still have a long way to go. If you know someone who is struggling to accept a gay son or lesbian daughter, I would be happy to loan you this DVD. Or perhaps you would like to rethink your own feelings and assumptions about this issue. Let me know.